Tis the Season...

Tis the Season…

Tis the Season for my heart to break.  I have noticed I’m like SUPER emotional lately.  Call it X, call it Y, call it X + Y=Z…there are many reasons.  Every year right around that merge from Thanksgiving to Christmas ‘season’ I start to really think about just how lucky, I, we (my family) are.  I think it is just part of who I am…and after a quick phone call to my mom tonight I think it’s also in our blood.  Yes, typically women are more emotional than men…some women have an extra high emotional q (kind of like IQ but EQ) and perhaps that theromemter gets turned way up around the Holiday season!

It seems this year I’m extra emotional as I cant even make it through the grocery store with out crying.

I text my friend that very statement and her reply was simple “What are you seeing?”  I then decided I’d blog about it…b/c maybe you all are seeing it too.  Or, rather, maybe you are NOT seeing it and this will encourage all of us to open our eyes a bit more and perhaps even make a difference.  As Natalie Grant says “What are we waiting for?”


 

Ok so why is my heart breaking….

My heart is breaking b/c as I already stated, I feel so blessed, especially this time of year.  I have a roof over my head, food in my pantry- enough to get me through a winter long blizzard where even if I can never leave my house, I’m still g2g.  I have clean clothes on my back and a whole closet to last me the rest of the winter with out every doing laundry if I wanted- pretty typical, right women??  We have a warm bed to sleep in every night.  I have a good job, a healthy family- you get the point. 

So today I stopped by Kroger on my way home from work.  I was waiting patiently at the deli for my pound of lunch meat to be sliced and baged as I noticed out of the corner of my eye two white garbage bags on the floor.  All I could see were the two garbage bags and part of a shoe.  My initial thought was “I wonder why that person didn’t take their cans back before they ordered their deli item.”  I don’t know about ya’ll…but I HATE taking the cans back b/c it is so messy and I feel like I need a shower in sanitizer after it’s over.  I personally do not touch any kind of food if I still am hauling around the bags of cans.  So anyway…as I’m processing this thought (I know it took me 2 sentences to explain, but know this all happened within 3 seconds- LOL) the foot moved and I noticed the person’s shoe was completely worn out and the owners foot was spilling out of the side of the shoe.  My eyes made their way up and I processed the fact that this ladies coat was completely worn and torn all to pieces.  I then put two and two together- those bags were not filled with returnable cans, but rather her clothing and prized possessions.  I instantly got a sick feeling and thought here we go again…my heart breaking again.  So the deli employee looks at the three of us standing there and hollers out “Who’s next?”  I had already ordered, as had the lady next to me who was in her stilettos, black designer suit and her Coach bag sat comfortably in her shopping cart piled high with other items.  Her and I both glanced over at the 3^rd customer and signaled it was her turn, we were taken care of.  The women, very politely, ordered 4 slices of cheese.  (How often we dont even hear please and thank you anymore)  I then noticed she had nothing in her hand (no basket, no cart) except a Kroger brand loaf of wheat bread (cheers to her for the wheat choice ;) )  Ok…heart beating faster now.  The deli employee accidently cut 5 slices of cheese and as he counted them out he looked up at her as to ask ‘Is the 5^th piece of cheese ok?”  She motioned very politely, no thank you.  He bagged up her 4 slices of cheese and sent her on her way.  She said “Thank you very much, have a great day.” And walked away.  I was still waiting for my POUND of meat to be sliced…which seemed like eternity by the way…and I said a quick prayer “Ok God, what do I do?? What do I do?”  I knew what He would do…but all my own insecurities started to flood my mind.  I didn’t want to offend her by offering her some cash.   I thought about a few things I could say such as “Merry Christmas”  or “here, I don’t know your story but it doesn’t matter, I hope you can buy something warm to eat” etc. THEN rushed in insecurities -I thought well I guess I don’t know for sure that she is in need, maybe she just had a rough day at work and cut her shoes open and who knows what the trash bags are all about??  You get the point by now…I talked myself out of doing something although I so badly knew in my heart that I should have.  We call that the gut feeling.

If you are wondering what the outcome was….I did walk up to the front of the store, after I received my deli item, and saw her checking out for her two items.  I stood there like a runaway bride entering the church…still and cold…I still didn’t know what to do!  I seriously couldn’t even think the rest of the time I was at the store checking the items off of my grocery list including a $4.50 bottle of pinenuts…I mean give me a break…she couldn’t even swing a 5^th piece of  Kroger brand cheese and here I am buying Boars Head and a bottle of pinenuts. 

Ok so maybe you are thinking…this doesn’t convict you like it does me.  That is ok too!

My point is…this is going on all around us.  We don’t need to travel to 3^rd world countries to see the poor and oppressed…it is right in our backyard!  I mean trust me, if you want to have a good glimpse of how lucky we are to be Americans…DO travel to a 3^rd world country.  I still have images painted in my mind from a trip this past summer. 

If you are reading this and wondering where I was…I was in Canton, MI.  A middle class suburb where we certainly may notice someone with a big hole in their shoes walking around the grocery store w/ their closet in a bag. …not judging or being snoody just giving demographics here- I wasn’t in Detroit.

The point is…I did nothing tonight…and I surely wish I had.  When I came home…still shaking…and told my hubby what happened he laughed and said “Oh Grubb” (only b/c I have cried over stuff like this 3 times in the past 4 days- LOL) and told me I should have just done it.  I should have JUMPED as my dear Princess Sister Cathy would say.  I should have lived boldly not worrying about offending.  No amount is to little.  Point blank.  I didn’t need to buy her a house or a basket of groceries…but I surely could have tried to make a difference.  Maybe I could have brightened her day by just a little bit.

Tis the Season for a lot of people to hurt.  I mean people are hurting all year round, we all know this, but I feel that this time of year people are especially hurting b/c so many others are going spending crazy and pepper spraying people at Wallmart for a $30 doll and they can’t even afford a 5^th piece of cheese.  People are waiting in line for HOURS to buy STUFF and other people don’t even have the bare essentials.  Oh how badly I wish I could have just given this lady a new pair of tennis shoes…especially b/c it was raining out!

Sure, some critics will say “well maybe she was a drug addict” and you know what you are right..maybe she was.  But what I saw today was someone who has a story, trying to buy some basic food, with all her possessions in two garbage bags and I was buying a $4.50 bottle of pinenuts.  It is not up to me to cast judgement on to others…its not up to you either.  Simply put…if you feel called/tugged/blessed enough to help someone else out GO FOR IT.  JUMP.  Don’t wait until it is too late and the opportunity passes. 

Today I’m taking my experience as a learning point to remind myself…and hopefully others…to just go for it.

Again…doesn’t have to be BIG…all gestures count. 

In fact, if you are reading this will you do our community a favor and forward on this blog post to simply remind each other to help those in need this season?  If you see a Salvation Army bell ringer, drop a buck in their shiny red tin.  If you see a Marine Corps Toys for Tots bin, run back in to the store and make a purchase for another child (and if you have kids…don’t forget to explain to them what you are doing so they understand the importance of giving as wellJ)  If you clean out your closet, set aside the bag of clothes for a charity of your choice.  If your kids outgrew some toys, donate them to a local in home daycare or a shelter.  If you don’t like taking the cans back either…donate them to a local food bank or maybe just give them to someone doing another can return at your local store.  If you have a bunch of friends…have everyone over for desert or wine and cheese and have them bring a toy for a charity or a can of food for the food bank.

So many ideas my friends. 

Tis the season for the blessed to help the oppressed. 

We all have a story.  Maybe part of your story is still to be wrote…maybe yours is in a previous chapter, Maybe you are still bitter that you can’t stand to help someone else just yet or maybe you are one that needs the help from the pinenut buying chic. 

Wherever you are in your book…My prayer is that your eyes are open to what is going on in our backyard and that perhaps you make someone smile today, tomorrow and dare I even say maybe forever J

Happy Holiday Season Ya’ll…let’s make it one to remember for the right reasons!

Kristen

A pine nut buying ,heart breakin, Jesus lovin Princess…