Reversal of Destiny!

A Reversal of Destiny!

I encountered a reversal of destiny on June 11, 2012 at apx 8:20pm.  Pretty specific, I know.  The thing is, I know exactly the date and time because it was one of my regular bible study meetings with my Princess Posse.  I know the time, b/c every other Monday we watch a video from 7:30-8:30pm and this particular week, my reversal of destiny occurred in the last few minutes of the video.  Pretty sure I will never ever forget that moment.  The Princess Posse is currently studying the Book of Esther with Beth Moore as our virtual leader.  If anyone were to ask me “Who is your mentor?”-  I would be quick to respond that Beth is certainly one of mine.  Although I have never met her in person, it feels as though we have been lifelong friends.  You may be thinking weird…but I can tell you I have heard many of my sisters say this same thing.  When we are doing our weekly homework, we can literally hear her talking as we read the words she scribed on the pages of our workbook.  This woman has no doubt discovered her God given talents of writing and teaching.  I have learned so much through her teaching that I have decided to teach myself.  I use that word VERY loosely b/c my group knows best, I hate the pressure of calling myself their teacher.  It’s more like a facilitator to me.  But nonetheless, yep, I lead the Princess Posse every other Monday night as we dig through the pages of the living word that has for sure, no doubt, changed all of our lives.  If you want to know why in the world we call ourselves princesses- read more HERE.

NETWORKING TIME

Greetings!

Today's blog is a bit different than most.  Today I am going to ask something of you- please help us in our networking process.  In this 21st century that we live in full of social media via Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, blogging, email and more- it seems fit to use in under these circumstances as well.  Please, feel free to send this blog link around.  My goal is two fold.  I'll get to the first part of the goal in a moment, but the 2nd half is that perhaps our story will inspire someone who needs to know there is always hope in the future.  Living with the motto that the best days are still yet to come is healthy for anyone :)  God has a plan for EVERYONE'S life (Jeremiah 29:11) so keep your head up in this tough tough world we live in!

Ok, so now on to the details aka Goal 1:

Phil and I have been cleared and approved, by Forever Families Adoption Agency, and are officially in the 'waiting pool' to adopt a child.

One way you can help us is to just spread the word.  Feel free to forward this blog link around or just keep your eyes and ears open.  Below are some links with more details; I am also providing a link to a photo book that tells our story.  Anyone interested may view (believe it or not- this is very common for domestic adoption):

http://kristenulin.shutterfly.com/  (scroll down to the section labeled “Photo Books”)

Currently we are approved for a domestic (USA) infant adoption which means if you know someone who is pregnant that is looking to place their child for adoption, or possibly considering other options, please send them this link or provide them with my contact info listed below.  We can get connected with them and see if it is a good fit.  There is a lot of formality and legality behind it all which is why we have selected such a respected and warm agency out of Novi, MI.  We can however, adopt from anywhere in the country and are not restricted to Michigan. 

Click HERE to read our letter to adoptive mom/family

Click HERE to read our adoption profile for the agency
Click HERE to read more about our story and how we ended up in the adoption process

 Thank you for helping us network as we prayerfully hope to become a PARTY OF FOUR :)

Sincerely,

Team Ulin

Adoption Profile

Phil & Kristen Ulin

Why we think we make good parents:

Already being parents to our daughter, Kaylee, we understand the commitments needed to be successful loving parents.  We have learned to become great parents you must love unconditionally.  Coming from families with strong values, we are eager to teach and share with our children these family traditions.   Both of us have strong work ethic but appreciate fun in the sun, and we would like to share our life experiences with another team member.

Values we plan to share/teach a child:

Our home is filled with love whether you are a guest or a member of the family.  The greatest value we feel we can teach is to love and respect others.  We both believe in a strong work ethic, but also downtime to recharge our batteries and enjoy life.  We feel it is important to have a relationship with God and have raised our daughter in a Christian home but also respect everyone’s opinion and other value systems.  It is important to us to be generous, compassionate and live with a “glass is half full” mentality.  We believe in learning from our mistakes and the principle that failure is never final.  We believe in following your dreams and plan to teach our children that no dream is too big.

The people/pets/things that make up our family: 

Our immediate family consists of Phil (dad), Kristen (mom), and Kaylee (daughter).  We both come from fairly large families and view many of our friends as family too- Kaylee calls our best friends “Aunt and Uncle”.  Kaylee can’t wait to have a brother or sister and says a prayer at the dinner table every night asking God to bless her with one.  Both of our families live in the area and many of our friends live in our community.  We also have what we call an extended church family with MANY kids to play with and have fun outside of the home.

Things our family celebrates:

We love to celebrate!  Birthdays are a big deal around our home because we love making each other feel special.  We celebrate all major holidays and also like to have fun celebrating the Super Bowl, the Kentucky Derby (some of Kristen’s family is from Kentucky), and love having summer cookouts for no reason.

Religion/spiritual beliefs:

Spirituality, a relationship with Jesus, is very important to our family and we plan to raise our children in a Christian home.  We currently attend a non-denominational church and have for over 10 years.  Our church family is FULL of children of all ages and has a fantastic kids program.  Phil currently volunteers in the preschool area during one of the church services and Kristen has done 2 mission trips in 3 years.  We believe that our spiritual foundation has been the rock for our life and plan to demonstrate this to our children to help them find meaning and happiness in life. 

Things we like to do (activities/hobbies):

We like to have fun!  Working hard and playing hard are two things that must go together.  We love to travel and hope to expose our children to many cultures.  We like to make pancakes on Saturday mornings, roast s’mores in the fireplace when it gets cold and keep each other laughing every day.  We also like to stay active by going running as a family with our jogging strollers, doing outdoor activities and keeping a healthy focus in the home.  We are both triatheletes and feel strongly that you can do anything you put your mind too with dedication and encouragement.  Every season our activities change and we like to find fun new things to do as a family like going out for ice cream after a nice summer run or watching movies by the fire in the winter.

Our ethnic background:

Phil is 50% Hispanic and 50% European descent (mostly German).  His mom comes from a large Hispanic family most of which live 30 minutes from us although a few 2^nd cousins and great aunts still live in Guadalajara, Mexico.  His Grandma has 11 brothers and sisters and owns a Mexican restaurant. 

Kristen is mixed European descent- mostly German with some Austrian and Native American descent.

Where we live:

We live in a colonial home in a suburb between Detroit and Ann Arbor.  Our town was recently ranked one of the safest in the state!  We have a TON of space in our home and can’t wait to share that space with another son or daughter- Kaylee asks us every day for a brother or sister!  We are walking distance to the grade school and have several parks close to us.  We have a large yard with a playscape in the back and enjoy spending time outside having fun.

One thing we would like the birth family to know about us:

We respect you so much for choosing to give your child a precious gift.  We have already begun praying for you and know that our paths will not cross on accident.  We strongly believe everything happens for a reason and are here to support, pray, and thank you for a wonderful and precious gift.  

Dear Birth Mom/Family

Thank you so much for giving us the opportunity to introduce ourselves and tell you about our family- we are Kristen and Phil.  We are so grateful that you love your unborn child so much that you are willing to consider an adoption plan for him or her. Already being parents to our daughter, Kaylee, we understand the commitment needed to be successful loving parents.  We have learned to become great parents you must love unconditionally.  Coming from families with strong values, we both are eager to teach and share with our children these family values.  

We met 9 years ago while in college at Eastern Michigan University.  Kristen was entering her final year and Phil had just graduated when we met.  It all started with a date for Kristen's birthday...and the rest is history. :)   Our life experiences have helped us to grow as individuals and as a 'team'... in fact we like to sign our Christmas cards "Love, Team Ulin."  We are fortunate to have experienced an abundance of life at such a young age and truly hope to expand our family to a Team of Four.  We have struggled with infertility for almost 2 years and have learned that Kaylee was truly a little miracle.  Through these chapters in our life, we strongly believe when one door closes another opens which is why we are beyond thrilled to enter the adoption process!  We so badly want to expand our family and pray that something in our story may resonate with you, and that you will have peace knowing we will care for and love your child unconditionally.  Kaylee can not wait to have a brother or a sister- in fact she asks almost every single day during her prayers if Jesus will give her a brother or sister.  It melts our heart!  She is already setting toys aside telling people “this is for my brother or sister” …we often get asked if Kristen is expecting because Kaylee talks about it all the time! J

A Virtual Baby Book! Snap!

If you want to see the rain...you must fill up the clouds first!

As we near the finish line of this process to enter the domestic adoption pool, I thought that I better start documenting some of this!  It's kind of like starting the baby book now I suppose!  If I had any male readers at all...I just lost them- LOL!  But hang in there, trust me, this is not going to be the typical book...I mean who are we kidding, I am learning quickly nothing is typical in my/our life and that is why we love it most!  When I was pregnant, I found it therapeutic to document how I was feeling & what symptoms I was having.  I documented my weight gain, physical changes and things like the first kick...all the while thinking in the back of my mind that I would again some day reference this journal and compare notes to my second pregnancy.  Well this post is not going to be a sob story, but rather a NEW chapter in Team Ulin's life.  If you would like to read about our journey click here and it will give you more than enough details on how we ended up from point A to point B.

Why the opening quote?  Because I feel that the adoption process can be just as much of a blessing as a regular pregnancy can be.  You must look at all of the obstacles as blessings, road blocks, detours or re-directions.  After you CHOOSE your own happiness...you will start to SEE the rain :)

Will you join us on this journey?

Chairein!

(Pronounced Chai-rain) which means Greetings in Greek and the transliteration is “Joy to You.”

Before you go thinkin’ I’m some Greek and/or transliteration commentarist (not sure if that is even a word)…just know that Miss Elizabeth Moore taught us this very Greeting in tonight’s Video session where we are studying the book of James together J

I needed to start this blog by saying “Greetings!” b/c yes, it has been awhile since I’ve blogged.

It’s been awhile, but not b/c I don’t have anything to say…I mean COME ON, I’m a chic, it’s been awhile b/c life just happens sometimes.  I can barely stay awake past 9pm lately, I have a 2.5 year old who delightfully occupies my time, I lead a Princess Posse group, I work full time and I’m going back to school to obtain my Masters…whew, I’m tried just typing that!  I’m not trying to write my resume here, just sayin’ life happens sometimes!  J

Sooo what does this voice comin’ from a Princess have to say…

Let’s begin by saying the main purpose of this entry is to ask for something from all of you, the readers.  If you are the prayin’ kind of gal or guy (not sure I have to many guy readers, but hey…never know…) I have a prayer request.  My request is that Team Ulin actively and clearly discerns on a big decision we have added to our plate.  Psh, there is no one size fits all plate up in my family.  When there isn’t room, we pile it on top of something else.  Kind of like my Thanksgiving dinner plate…I like turkey and ham, so I throw that ham right on top of the turkey to make more room for the sweet potatoes…can I get an amen?!  And yes, I make sure I do a spinning class Thanksgiving morning soley and only so I can eat an extra piece of cheesecake, although my friend Alicia's chocolate pie has now made it to the 'favorites' list! 

Before I dive in to what the big decision is (my Princess Posse is already snap snapin at this point b/c they surely know where this car is headed…) let me begin w/ a bit of background.  Team Ulin consist of Phil, myself and our beautiful and full of sass 2.5 year old Kaylee Gabriella Ulin.  However, we would love to be Team Ulin party of 4…or possibly b/c we know God likes curve balls, party of 5.  But for the sake of everyone, please for the Love of our Heavenly Rockin’ Father (sayin that for real, not in vain)…let’s not make our plate like so heavy it like spills into a big mess.  PTL for that! J  Team Ulin has been trying to expand to a party of 4 for 17 months.  I won’t bore you with details (ESP if there really are male readers-HA) but clearly we have not been successful.  Or rather, it just hasn't been our story/His plan yet.  Let me like back up one more step and say, through all of these 17 months, we have really tried our hardest to stay positive and remind ourselves that God’s plan is always perfect.  I will add that I am human…and female…so yes there have been a LOT of tears, disappointment, why questions, confusion (lots of confusion), doctor visits, tests, new techniques some of which I laugh out loud just remembering…such as the first time I ever let my chiropractors partner use an ink pen to click the back of my neck while I stuck my hand on a vile of something and stared at her like a crazy women as she clicked away asking me if I felt it?!  (Disclaimer, I absolutely LOVE and am FOR chiropractic…I just thought this woman was crazy for a moment, that’s all.)   Through all of this, there has also been restored hope, upon restored hope, upon A-Ha moments of “Oh that’s why it hasn’t happened yet” (for example when I came down w/ Dengue Fever on Aug 21^st and thought I was surely dying!) Through these 17 months God has shown me who He is even in the valleys of depression, disappointment and confusion.  He has proven to me time and time again that He feels my pain just as much as I do.  I promise you that He knows, that He listens and that He is in control.  I recently received a text message from a distant girlfriend who has absolutely NO Idea any of this is going on.  The text message read “God already knows the pain you have experienced and can feel it.  Do not let it hinder His plans for you”  What this distant girlfriend did not know…is that later that day, I would get a big explicit piece of information letting me know this month was still not our time.  (ps when I received her text at 8:34am, my reply was "Good morning, are you sure you sent this to the right person?  as I had no clue what she was talking about until about 3pm in the afternoon)  For any women out there who have experienced a similar story…you KNOW just how HARD day 1 of a cycle is.  Can I get another AMEN?    Or two amens…b/c another one is needed for the friend who felt called to deliver a message that would once again restore the hope back in my life.  Let me stop (do you feel like you have whiplash yet…I’m going to be backin’ up, and stopping, and movin’ forward a lot so strap on that seatbelt!)   and add that I wish we got these messages monthly!  There were many months, two in particular, that I will never ever for the rest of my life forget.  Those two months were very very very hard on me…and there was not a restoration of hope in those valleys.  The restoration often comes later.  I’ll add that He always knows what we can handle and His timing is always perfect.  The month I got the text message, He knew how badly I needed a word from Him to keep going.  Not to keep going w/ trying to expand to a Party of 4…to literally keep going walking w/ Him, b/c boy I was in a valley!  I was so confused, in fact, I have never been more confused and broken over something in my entire life.  I am not going to get into all the details of why I was so confused, but know that it was a ROUGH month.  He knew how badly I needed to be reassured in a real and tangible way.  He knew that I could not take one more month like I had the previous month.  He knew there were not enough kleenex left in our house to get me through another 'day 1' ...we had wiped out the kleenex supply the month before!  Jut trust me, he knew I needed a word.  Some of those moments are not to be shared, those are between He and I. and Phil. But trust me, He knew,  and…He delivered it, according to His timing.  And I replied with "you can't make this stuff up!" :)  THAT is how cool and real He is.

Ok…if you are reading my blog for the first time, hang in there…I swear there will be substance and points to all this.  But also know that someone out there needs to hear my story.  Someone out there knows what I’m screamin’…someone out there knows my pain and needs their text message to keep going.  Someone out there needs DETAILS so I’m sorry if it is too much for you.  But I’m not sorry that my story will be shared, b/c  afterall, that is what life is all about.  Helping others get their moment and reflecting on our own story to say you know what, maybe I’m going through all of this b/c my story will be someone else’s text message. 

So, yep, 17 months have come and gone and looking back I have learned a TON about myself, about Him and about others who have been through some rough times regarding growing a family as well.  Yes there have been rough months, but I must say some months weren't so bad.  Like May- I had trained for 5 months to complete my first tri-athalon and I still deeply wanted to get 'two lines' but I also didnt want to back out of the race, so that month the disappointment wasn't that bad ;)

I am beyond blessed to have a great group of female friends who I can pray with, pray for and grow with.  (if you are interested in the princess posse, let me know…of course there was going to be a plug for that b/c let me tell you, this group is my core!)  You may be thinking why is this so hard on me, I am already lucky enough to have one biological child.  You are correct, I am so grateful!  And how Kaylee came about is a whole other blog entry to be posted some day…let’s just say she is my little lightning bolt and glue to our little family J  However, we want another child just as badly as we wanted the first.  And here is the thing, not everyone wants more than one child.  I am a believer, that a lot of our desires are placed and/or changed on our heart b/c of what God wants for our life.  He could very easily take away the desire for us to want to grow our family and life would proceed…w/ that already full plate.  But that is not our story.    He has begun to mold our hearts into a way I never thought I would see.  He has showed me that He is tired of easy answers for everything b/c life is just not easy.  That is just not the way it goes.  Just when we think we got life all figured out, God throws a curve ball.  He will continue to show us His authority when we think we get authority over something.  If that doesn’t make sense to you..its ok…it makes sense to someone who needed to hear it.

My prayer request is that we discern on if He wants part of our story to include adopting a child from the U.S.  You had to read all of this ‘voice’ just to get to that?  Yep.  Pretty simple actually.  But so very layered and deep at the same time.  You see, adoption is like a pretty big deal.  There is a lot at stake and a lot to gain.  Currently, Phil and I feel called to this path.  We are at the very early stages, but this path has been being paved for awhile…and if I have learned anything in my 29 years, I have learned that God has wired both of us to go from 0-60mph in a second.  I would not be surprised if this all unfolds and we had a newborn in our house by Christmas.  Lord, I’ll need some grace if that is your plan- LOL…just sayin’ wouldn’t be surprised.  Now He has also taught me, that “just when I think I have it figured out…He throws curve balls” so for all I know…we may be waiting to adopt until we’re 80!  Things have already started moving quickly.  We have started telling our family and close friends of our journey and the reactions are varied..which is to be expected.  Many are scratching their heads b/c they had no idea of all the long talks, tears, and yet excitement that has been going on under our roof…others are not surprised at all and are already offering to babysit…others are concerned we are ‘giving up to quick.’  I’ll tell you one thing…we are NOT giving up on anything.  Rather, we are acting on what we are feeling called to do.  There are many more details I could write about specific to this calling, but I will lose all the readers if I go on forever- HA.  So what I’ll do is say if you want to know more don’t hesitate to ask, email, Facebook, tweet, text or send a letter in the mail ;)  (all generations covered there)  My purpose of this post is to ask for prayer but also to be a text message of hope for someone. 

I’ll conclude by telling you that although adoption is second choice for us, it is NEVER second best.  It is second choice only b/c we would LOVE to have another biological child BUT we mostly would LOVE to choose God’s plan for our life which essentially erases our desires and makes His desires first choice anyway.  I am smiling as I type just thinking about it all.  I am smiling thinking about all the NEW joy we can have in our life by giving a child a home.  We recently attended an information meeting on adoption at our church and I couldn’t help by cry the whole time as I started to experience a new kind of joy, a new kind of goosebumps that one must get when you realize you can have all the same joys as you would with a biological child…but then it is multiplied b/c it’s a new kind of joy of WOW this child wouldn’t even have a home if we wouldn’t have acted.  A women shared her story of watching her adopted daughter get baptized at the age of 7.  She balled her eyes out because who knows if her daughter, who was born in China, would have ever even heard the word of God if they didn’t become her parents.  Now that is what gets me fired up!

If this is part of His story for us, I can expect that it will be great.  No one said easy…but He said great (John 15)

One more disclaimer...this is not a plug for adoption.  Adoption is NOT for everyone, in fact, as I already mentioned, I never dreamt it would be for us.  I never really knew anything about it.  We just have a LOT Of reason to believe that it very well may be a part of our story.  So if you are reading and can relate to my story, know that your prayer request can be whatever your heart desires!  

So would you join us on this journey in prayer?  Please pray that we first discern and then if it is indeed His plan, that we jump.  There is a big difference in hearing/confirming His plan and then acting on it.  To ask for prayers on this is a big thing…b/c if people are praying…He moves. 

Tis the season for Thanksgiving.  I’m thankful you read this entire post- HA.  No really, I’m thankful for my family party of 3 and I’m thankful to be a servant for Him even though I am not even close to being perfect, He loves me anyway.

Chairein ya’ll.  Chairein.  Joy to you. ..and maybe an AWE snap too! J